My Deltoid Dilemma

The two men in my life  could attest that in the house I am the queen of tae-bo , the ying of yoga and the try-hard  practitioner of Pilates. 

Where  for some people the slightest exertion would have caused faintness and fatigue, I was tae-boeing away even last year with a hemoglobin of 7.8 (the normal hemoglobin is 13). With the accidental knowledge of my severe anemia I thought it was wise to give my heart what I believed  was a much-needed reprieve.  It was a months-long set back that left my body out of shape, sad to say.

This summer I went home to the Philippines and was amazed to see my sister- in- law who used to be a tae-bo disciple like me turn her back from this high-intensity cardio tae-kwon-do/boxing program into the relaxed and meditative routine of yoga with amazing results.  She was truly long and lean, and her arms which had a natural tendency to bulge, was tight, toned and lengthened.  Furthermore, she walked with her back straight like a ballerina and pardon me kids, but I had to say this for the married ladies like me, that it did wonders for her sex life, said she.

Something happened to me over the summer.  I am now past everyone else’s fascination for abs. Toned biceps is for me the new six-pack.

I was inspired when I came back home to renew my commitment to fitness and with a now normal hemoglobin (thanks, ferrous sulfate!), I was ready to beat my heart out.  Well, not really, since yoga wasn’t really a cardio routine.   The  tae-bo queen had to give up her crown because I realized all the jumping and the pulling and the kicking strained my knees and my back. I dreamed of losing the flab and toning the deltoids and abs, having long, shapely legs and a proud ballerina posture.  I would pop in Louise Solomon’s yoga-lates  DVD and do my downward dogs, my planks and warrior poses along with my pilates core workout.  All summer long I watched and waited and did get some results.  Unfortunately, doing all the upside down poses must have worsened my acid reflux  a few more months of yoga  and I would’ve been in need of surgery.

Almost every girl-celebrity in Hollywood wants to get the reed-like frames of the cat-walk trotting, anorexic  European models. (Just look at the girls of Disney Channel.)  I could easily get that look since I was born with small bones but I won’t.  I want  long and lean but not thin.  More the likes of "Royal Pains"’ Reshma Shetty’s tight and toned shoulders with the  bones protruding like so.

And so I was working on that  goal until I discovered “The Glades’” Kiele Sanchez’s magnificently formed  deltoids. 

That’s when I added weights to my work out and scoured Cable’s Exercise TV  and found Cindy Whitmarish’s  “Tank Top Ready Upper Body” video which became my daily routine.   I started doing push ups and biceps and triceps curls.  I couldn’t do without cable service the few days we lost it since it meant no “Tank Top Ready Upper Body”  exercise video for me. Everyday for three weeks I would ask my poor  husband how my biceps and arms look and he would say “they’re  fine”.  I watch my deltoids in the mirror umpteen times a day. They were getting tighter, to be sure, but a long way to go from that of Kiele Sanchez’s. I tried harder, and changed from three pounds to  five pounds and consumed a lot more eggs despite my fear of cholesterol.  The game changer was that moment  when I came to the husband (who’d use to reassure me when I asked if my biceps were either too small or too big that they were fine) who replied  “Untat ka lang guro anay, babes” (“You should probably stop”).  Yes, you can read between the lines.

And so, after all that’s been said and done I am back to being the tae-bo queen three to four times a week until I get this deltoid dilemma of mine figured out. 

Reshma Shetty’s  or Kiele Sanchez’s ?  You will soon see.